tired #218 januari 2005
ok, i was tired earlier tonight, but hey i am not a wreck. i am still standing. even though my achilles heel is completely fucked, i got some weird soar south of my lips and my flu from shanghai hasn’t really left me yet. still going strong are my asthma, my constantly cold feet and the horror of having my heart beat altered. you see, i am fine!
maybe i should have started this text with this paragraph but i just had to comment my photo. this paragraph is about being alone but not lonley, or is it lonley but not alone. oscar left me today. after one and a half year of constand hanging out (even in the mountains of sweden), today we shook hands and hugged for the last time in a while. today oscar flew home to london. he wasn’t happy about it but i think he will get back to normal, well not really normal. instead of a boyfriend next to him he will now have a girlfriend! the girlfriend, chelsea, is replacing me in the cube world of 53D london.
so, today was my first day on my own. and it was strange. things were a bit simpler, you didn’t have to argue about what to do and where to go all the time. you may think that’s better but i disagree. instead i ended up doing all the things i wanted and believe me, not half of the things were even fun. because when you are with someone you only do what you really want to. you never win an arguement about doing something you’re not prepared to fight for.
tomorrow i will look up flights to usa. i still haven’t decided if i should go to LA or SF first. i think it’s cheaper to LA though, but LA is not easy to start with. is it?
ok good night